Friends

1. Post these rules.
2. Each tagged person must post 8 things about themselves on their journal.
3. At the end, you have to choose and tag 8 people
4. No tag-backs.

leptismagna and sparklywalls both tagged me, roflol. I don't think there's really anything you don't already know, but here goes:

1. I did ballet/other types of dancing from the age of 7 right up until I was 17. I was awesome at it, always getting commended/highly commended in my exams. When I was 11, I was the only one of my age-group to be picked by my teacher to go and audition for the Royal Ballet School. I didn't get in, which was okay because I was too scared anyway. They said that I was a very promising dancer, but I didn't get a place because my body shape was too curvy. Haha. They knew that I was gonna grow into a curvy woman-shaped thing even back then. I curse my breasts, damnit. This is why kids get so uptight about their figures, yo. I can imagine a lot of people, having been told that, would get loads of body image issues. Luckily I didn't. Then again, imagine me leaping about the stage with these 38D bangers - never gonna happen!

2. The brassiére I am currently wearing is a 38D, and feels a little too small. Uh-oh.

3. I got given £115 for my birthday, to 'buy yourself some wine and flowers' or 'get yourself some drinks tonight' or 'have some fags!' (The last is from my great aunt Chrissie, who is a veteran chain smoker). However, none of that money went on anything of the sort. Nothing nice for me. I got nice things from people anyway, but it still makes me sad. I love shopping. I want to go and spend £115 right now. But I have -£35 in one account and £1.87 in the other. I do have loads of books to read though, thanks to my cleaning job.

4. I'm watching Friends right now. Nothing has made me laugh more on TV over the years than Friends. I will always, always love that show. It's got me through some really tough times, that. Can't sleep, mind ticking over? Friends. Had a shit night out? Toast and Friends. I love it so. I can probably recite all the scripts. I had all the videos but gave them all to Jeannie when I moved into my little flat and there was no room. I'm currently collecting the DVD box sets.

5. I need the loo, brb.

6. I'm going to have so much fucking fun on Saturday night it's untrue. I want to really let my hair down. If anyone wants to come we're going to the Station opposite my house.

7. I've applied for that internal auditing job.
8. I forgot to walk Alfie, brb.

I tag getmilesaway, bucjo, claireoujisama, felicisfelix, piggelin, madam_h, maxnot and mmipanda!

James Sharpe:

• 00:27 as a writer, you basically live for the epiphany moments, when an entire story just falls into place in your head. I just had one. #
• 23:50 is worried that one day companies will come clean and say "actually, tea is seriously bad for you and will kill you the instant you hit 40" #

For crying out loud, this rottweiler will NOT STOP jumping up at the window. She's only just asked to go out! I can't go anywhere without her being under my feet, nuzzling my hand and breathing all over me. I've never known such a clingy, needy dog in all my life. The so-called 'hard' breeds are ALWAYS the soppiest.



"I miss my mum..."

I just suddenly smelled a ripe pooey smell. I turned around in time to catch Didz merrily chewing on some fresh turds. He hadn't even MOVED from where he was sleeping on Sasha's cushion.

O_o

Speechless. Coprophagia - not really the best thing about puppies. I bet that judge wouldn't have given him 3rd place if she knew he ate poos.

James Sharpe:

• 08:36 Just heard receptionist at work talking "doesn't it feel a bit...not Sunday anymore?" #
• 14:18 listened to a Radiolab podcast about the multiverse. Apparently it's more likely our reality/universe is a simulation than real and organic #

I'd rather be a singer than an internal auditor. People love me singing at the pub. They all say I'm brilliant, like, strangers come up to me and say I should be a proper singer, no more karaoke. I think I'm alright. I don't think I'm strong enough to be a lead singer but I'd love to do backing vocals or something. Or backing vocals and keys maybe. As part of a big band, so my mistakes (of which there are plenty) don't stand out. Haha. I played 'Across The Universe' (perfectly) and 'The Day We Caught The Train' (I went wrong too much and giggled and everyone told me off). Then Nikki and I sang 'Zombie' and 'Killing Me Softly' complete with proper pretty harmonies. She is wicked at singing too and playing rhythm/acoustic guitar. She is gonna be a mum soon though so wouldn't be able to commit to anything. I get frustrated 'cause I know I can do something really cool with my voice - it could be earning me some moneys. And it'd be fun. I've given up on being a proper rock star/ever getting anywhere with my own stuff. Every time I get my hopes up about something happening band-wise, the idea dies on its arse. Like I was gonna start singing with this supergroup, and that didn't happen, and I wasn't even surprised. We always think of awesome musical ideas/band plans but every time I end up disappointed and I get jaded and think fuck it I can't be bothered, 'cause everyone always gives up and I'm no good at writing on my own. I need a band to bounce ideas off of/try out riffs and things. And it doesn't work if I don't know the people. It's better if I know them really well, it's all about chemistry, babeh.

I miss my old bands so much. I miss working with Mikey and Dave. They've moved on now, MLG's pretty established and awesome and Mikey's drum and bass is... well, it's the best on the planet, no lie. I'm just a little bitter because I'm doing fuck all and if we'd stuck with Brother Earth we'd be as tight as you like by now and we'd probably be somewhere. There's still no-one else who sounds like we did. We played some epic metal, and it would've been brilliant nowadays, amongst all this nonchalant, boring, stale indie bollocks. But we left it because we thought we could do better things... and what did I end up doing? Nothing, as usual, because I don't push things enough. I wrote a couple of songs that have been forgotten, and I recorded a few 'aaahs' that nobody's ever going to hear... and everybody else moved on and made brilliant music while I watched Doctor Who and read books. I've spent the last few years getting over being a wannabe musician - I put my dreams to the back of my mind and got on with trying to set up a fun career and life for myself that didn't involve being in a band. Instead of what I was doing before - muddling through every day in a boring job but not minding because 'it's only a day job - I'll be a rock star one day'... Ugh. It worked for a while, I thought I was finally growing up and accepting it, but I've never stopped missing playing music. And what a wanker; I'm actually crying typing this. Saturday night brought it all back. Performing. I just miss it SO MUCH. And it's not even anything worth missing! All it is is coming up with some chords and singing a melody over them. Simple rock 'n' roll.

When it comes down to it, I just love to sing. For people, I guess. Dogs aren't that fussed. I don't care what kind of music. I would love to be in a soul band or something. Like The Commitments. Why not? I love singing so much. I am happy just to sing other people's songs in pubs so why can't I do that? A function band. Not very rock and roll. But I would make it different, like... a COOL band, proper soul, or classic rock, things like Pink Floyd and Led Zep and stuff that girls don't normally sing, i.e. not Beautiful South or Wet Wet Wet or Diana Ross or any of the other cheese that people play at weddings. So yeah, musicians/a band... How do I go about finding one of them? What kind of songs do you like hearing from pub covers bands?

...Internal quality auditor positions in Southampton. £22k-35k. £50k if you're über. TEMPTING. However, there is a reason why these jobs are so well paid - they're really, really boring.

I'm advertising K9 like mad, and getting nothing back. I can't do this anymore. And head office are no help whatsoever. "Don't leave, I'll get your business up and running in a month, I promise... I'll put some adverts in your local paper, just let me know what papers you have down there, we'll hit your area with some good advertising..."

THREE MONTHS later... Nothing.

I'm skint again and cannot afford anything. I haven't paid rent for August yet. There's no money in either of my accounts. Cleaning money's all gone now. I can't do anything for my birthday. I got £30 from my family on Saturday to spend on partying, and instead of partying I had to spend it on fricking diesel. My steering column is creaking now too, so I bet I'll have to spend another shitload on van repairs. I owe them £500ish again. I'm always oweing somebody something! And Peugeot are rubbish.

I'm thinking http://www.hays.com/JobSearch/JobDetails.aspx?RecordId=230126 and a nice cheap Corsa. And some new glasses, because I can't see. And I'd still rather like to get this tooth fixed. At least I can leave my dogs at home now, as there's two of them... they'll have company...

*sadface*

James Sharpe:

• 20:14 back from Norwich. Need more money to buy lots of books. People in big cars are wankers. Dan gave me the complete Sam and Max collection. #
• 20:22 tested and reviewed 7 different energy drinks with Dan yesterday. Relentless orange: good, red bull cola: bad. Monster: fucking awful. #
• 20:26 So far, no ill affects measured from different kinds of energy drinks. Mental health currently stable. No one dead. #

Went to a doggy show today, for our sins. After a heavy night I might add (more on that later). Took my boys and Max who's staying with us for a couple of weeks. I didn't know he'd be here so we didn't enter him, but I reckon he would've won. Gorgeous collie-flower.



You have no idea how long it takes to get these pictures. The bastards never sit still. I think I'm going to seriously start training my boys properly. Especially Floyd - he's a liability!






My Didz was 3rd place Best Crossbreed Dog. Floyd only got commended in his Purebreed class 'cause he's a rubbish schnauzer. His fur is clipped instead of stripped, he has patches of white hairs, he has a broken ear, wouldn't let the judge touch his beard and he kept sniffing the ground instead of standing stacked and looking pretty. I think he would do far better at agility than ringcraft, bless him. When I tug his lead impatiently and get him to stand up straight, he looks at me as if to say, "I'm a dog, not a car. I like RUNNING, not looking pretty, you dumbass."

James Sharpe:

• 01:11 Playing pacman championship edition with Dan. Seriously addictive! #

James Sharpe:

• 12:11 Chinese salted plums are not for human consumtion. Unless you want your stomach to dry out #

James Sharpe:

• 15:13 is going to Norwich for the weekend. Oh yes. #
• 22:16 In Norwich easy journey for once. Got through 3 episodes of this American life. I save them for long journies. #

like NOW
no kidding . im sick to fucking death of living here
All i get is abuse 24/7 by my entire family . i even have my nan ringing up to have a go at me and she lives in southampton

I've been trying to get a job for 2 years now to no avail and my sis quits her job and gains a new one on the same fucking day and starts saturday!!! I mean if thats not the worlds worst fucking downer i dunno what is :p

I had the best 3 days of my life sunday-tuesday . but i cant discuss it on here [as much as i want to i really cant]
but it was the best thing EVER
honestly im still in awe
hehe

But yea . *le sigh* . any one fancy letting me live with em?
x x x

In my Reading review I forgot to mention Future of the Left and Pete and the Pirates. Not surprised I forgot them - I can't even remember how either of them even sounded. Fail. I've got a massive muscle knot in my back. Hurts like a bitch. My lurgy seems to be better today, woohoo. I have nothing of worth to say so I'll just talk about my plans for the week - earn some money, make Floyd look pretty so he wins his class at the show on Sunday and practise songs for the Malt & Rock. I'm well scared. I know I'll go wrong, so I need to practise, big time. I think I'll probably do three or four songs, maybe starting with an old rock 'n' roll number? A Beatles song, some classic rock, a bit of glam? Any suggestions? I need rockin' songs that girls don't typically play, songs that go down well with pub locals, but not ones that are so popular that beery twats shout along with me!